Sometimes all you want is just a pat on the back, just a “hey, keep up the good work”, the “I see your effort”, but hey we don’t always get what we want. And you know what it fucking sucks, yes it fucking sucks!
We have been conditioned or let me rephrase that, we seem to flourish more when we are praised, applauded, when we are encouraged to keep doing what we are doing, that all our efforts are seen and that yes we are acknowledged. It’s such a positive reinforcement to be encouraged or just to hear that your work is being recognised, that your determination is appreciated and seem to be an inspiration. It in general is just an amazing feeling to be appreciated, to be acknowledged, to be recognized; it is like doing a marathon and the supporters’ just cheers for you from the side and that makes you determined to finish the race, to keep going and to eventually cross the finish line.
So we don’t always get what we want, but we do get what we need. Yes, so you don’t seem to be getting pats on the back and high 5, even “likes”, but why do you keep doing what you are doing? Okay, the “likes” and acknowledgement would be incredible, I mean being accepted and praised for your efforts and what you are good at, feels mucking afazing. But you won’t always get that, and that is okay (okay, the more you tell yourself that, the more it will start to make sense).
Sometimes you have to be your own cheerleader, there are times (always) where you are the one who has to pat yourself on the back, times when you have to state to yourself that you acknowledge and appreciate your own efforts, that you see it and what you are doing is good. (And being one’s own motivation can also be challenging). It is the same thing with running a marathon, yes there are people cheering you on and say that you must keep going, but what happens in that last stretch, those dying moments when you can see the finish line… but you just cannot or won’t go any further, it is just too hard and there isn’t any gratification (at that point) except the pain that shoots through your muscles and joints, the sweat that covers every inch of your body and the thought “why the F am I doing this at all, for what? Am I F’n insane?”. In that moment you have to be your own cheerleader, you have to be the motivation that you so desperately need, in that moment you have to dig deep in yourself and just go in strong, telling yourself;
“just one more step”, when there is actually 1000 to go,
“you can do this”, when you feel like you can’t anymore,
“you are a winner”, when all the odds are stacked against you and you have been so accustomed to losing,
“you are amazing”, when you feel like a failure and like you won’t ever be any good,
“you got this”, when you gave up hope and feel like everything is at a loss.
“you are almost there”, when it feels like you are right where you started.
In that moment outside encouragement would be ideal, the extra push that you need, but most times it has to come from within.
It is that voice inside that screams at you to just keep going, that quitting was never and won’t ever be an option, the pat on the back that pushes you forward when you don’t want to go anymore, the I am Proud of you whispers that you say to yourself, these are what will actually allow you to keep going. Acknowledging your efforts, being in your own corner, speaking positivity into yourself when negativity drowns you.
It is you and only you who can decide if you want to keep going, pushing yourself; but you have to be your own motivation, your own cheerleader and yes patting yourself on the back gets strenuous and high 5’ing oneself feels stupid, but when you cross that line, you will be prouder of yourself than anyone could ever be.
johyphendene 